


Baubles

by JinxedAmbitions



Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Canon Era, Explicit Sexual Content, Inappropriate Use of Mages, M/M, Massage, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Sex Toys
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2020-06-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:41:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,627
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24920977
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JinxedAmbitions/pseuds/JinxedAmbitions
Summary: Jaskier has a sex toy collection, and it takes Geralt far longer than it should to realize what the strange little trinkets he buys during their travels are actually for.  However, Jaskier is willing to demonstrate their purpose for him to help Geralt fully understand their usefulness and importance.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Comments: 50
Kudos: 821
Collections: Abby's Witcher Collection, Good Relationship Etiquette (familial included) - or Good BDSM Etiquette - or Good Relationship and BDSM Etiquette





	Baubles

Jaskier liked to collect baubles, pretty little things that caught his eye. They weren’t particularly large, almost like mementos from the places he traveled. Much as he fell in love with people, it seemed that he also fell in love with shiny objects.

Geralt didn’t comment on Jaskier’s habit of spending his coin on things that Geralt saw as useless. He’d never understand the necessity of owning a piece of glass shaped like a strange mushroom. However, it was Jaskier’s money, so it wasn’t for Geralt to comment on. He’d never asked Geralt to fund his collection, and he was even often insistent on spending any excess coin on Geralt.

So really, if he wanted something for himself, Geralt supported it even if he didn’t understand it. Even if it often had to be stored in Roach’s saddlebags because Jaskier didn’t feel the urge to obtain more than the most rudimentary pack to travel with.

The only time Geralt had bothered to ask the point of such a useless collection of figurines, Jaskier had turned a bright shade of red as his mouth had flapped open and closed. He’d waved his arms about like he wanted everyone to know that Geralt had asked him something completely idiotic, but they’d been in the forest with only Roach as a witness.

“Roach, did you hear what he just asked?” Jaskier had addressed the horse as though she cared one bit about it.

“Forget it. Just try to leave some space for actual provisions,” Geralt had grumbled, walking away to find something for them to eat since Jaskier’s collection left less room for food.

“Rude!”

So, Geralt didn’t ask, and since it had almost no impact on his life, he often forgot about the little baubles unless he was trying to find his potions satchel and instead came away with Jaskier’s little satchel instead.

It wasn’t until a particularly pointless contract, which ended before it had even really begun, that Geralt learned the true purpose of the collection. There had been a missing child who the mother had insisted had been snatched by a harpy or griffin or some other winged devil. As it turned out, the boy had gotten frightened while climbing trees with his friends. 

Not wanting a thrashing, since they’d been told not to climb trees, his friends had made up a story about a monster. It had taken Geralt less than an hour to locate the boy and rescue him, then the remainder of the hour being verbally torn apart by the lad’s mother who refused to pay since there hadn’t actually been a beast involved. She’d gone so far as to accuse Geralt of placing the boy in the tree to try to prey on her, despite the fact that he’d arrived in the village nearly a day after the boy had gone missing.

So, with no coin to show for his trouble, Geralt had gone in search of Jaskier. It didn’t take long to learn that he’d purchased a room for the evening despite it being barely midday. 

Jaskier had made some noise about taking time to compose, so Geralt assumed that was precisely what he was doing. Without giving it too much thought, he headed up to the room Jaskier had purchased. Jaskier was currently in possession of all of their coin, so there wasn’t much Geralt could do until he saw Jaskier anyway.

Geralt shifted his pack on his shoulder as he got to the door to their room for the night. He considered knocking, but Jaskier always got testy when Geralt interrupted his thoughts while he was composing. So, he simply swung the unlocked door open. 

Geralt froze in the doorway as he looked into the room. He was hit by the thick scent of arousal as his eyes took in Jaskier who was lying on his stomach on the cot. He wasn’t wearing any clothing, and his hair was still wet from the bath. 

However, what really captured Geralt’s attention was what was very clearly one of Jaskier’s little baubles which was currently in his ass. There was no other way to describe it. The beautifully colored glass was peeking out of the pucker of his ass, and Jaskier’s face was contorted in a look of ecstasy. 

Jaskier hadn’t realized he was there, and he continued to rock against the sheets. He reached back and touched the glass toy. His hips stuttered forward against the sheets, and he groaned.

Geralt’s cock twitched at the decadent scene in front of him, and he shifted slightly to give it room in his exceedingly tight pants. However, his movement caused one of the floorboards to creak.

Jaskier’s eyes flew open, and his whole body went tense. Then he let out a pitiful groan as his eyes rolled back, and Geralt smelled the telltale scent of spend fill the room. Jaskier’s cheeks flamed as he tried to move but only groaned more as he fell onto the sheets as his movements jostled the thing inside of him.

“The harpy,” Jaskier said, throwing an arm over his head and his pants over his ass.

“No harpy or any other creature. Just children afraid of the consequences of their foolishness,” Geralt said, stepping into the room and dropping his pack beside Jaskier’s lute. 

Now, he could see Jaskier’s whole collection of baubles set out on the small table beside the bed. Suddenly, their odd little shapes took on a new meaning. Geralt blinked at them for a long moment before his attention was drawn back to Jaskier who was shifting slightly on the bed.

“Shit, ah...a moment, if you would be so kind,” Jaskier said, one hand beneath the pants.

“A moment?” Geralt asked in confusion.

“Of privacy, Geralt.”

Geralt frowned. They hadn’t had privacy from one another since they began traveling together. For better or worse, they had experienced each other's most private moments including several bouts after bad meat, unfortunate hunting injuries, and a significant amount of sexual relief.

Clearly, Jaskier could read his expression easily because he explained himself when Geralt didn’t say or do anything other than frown. “I understand that you’ve already seen the worst of it, but I cannot relax with you having a sexual epiphany standing right there, and I cannot get this out of my ass until I relax…”

Geralt’s frown only deepened. Surely, he knew that Geralt would easily be able to hear...

“Geralt.”

“Hmm.” Geralt turned and left the room, shutting the door behind him. He stood outside the room completely able to hear Jaskier moving inside. He didn’t _mean_ to listen as Jaskier removed the little trinket from his person, but his senses picked up the sound without him trying.

There was a soft grunt followed by a sigh. “You can come back in,” Jaskier said, and it was quiet enough the Geralt knew Jaskier was aware he could hear everything despite the separation of the door.

Jaskier had his smallclothes back on when Geralt opened the door, but he was still stretched out over the cot. Though now he was stretched on his back, looking debauched and decadent in his lazy sprawl. His hair was an absolute mess, and his breathing was still a bit labored. He was covered in a sheen of sweat that gave off a scent Geralt had come to find comforting over the years.

“Go ahead, ask me why I would spend my coin to collect things to stick up my bottom,” Jaskier said, rolling onto his side. He looked wiped out, and Geralt’s perpetual frown only deepened further.

“Seems fairly obvious. The room certainly doesn’t smell of boredom or agony,” Geralt said, unfastening the closures on his armor as he approached the bed. The thick leather was suddenly too restrictive.

Jaskier laughed softly. “No, I don’t suppose it does. I had thought I’d have more time to…”

“Compose,” Geralt said, arching an eyebrow at what Jaskier often told him when he went in search of a room while Geralt went in search of work.

Another laugh, this one more hearty. “You are a quicker study than I gave you credit for, Geralt. Since you aren’t nearly the fool I took you for, would you rather skip to the part where you berate me?”

“Huh?”

“Don’t play coy now. I’ve seen the looks you give me when I waste our coin on such frivolous objects. You constantly bemoan them weighing down Roach’s saddlebags, and that was before you realized what they are used for. I suppose I’ll be finding my own way to the next village. Though this bed is rather soft. Perhaps, I will simply stay here…”

“And do what? Pleasure yourself to death?” Geralt asked, dropping his armor on top of his packs and taking a seat on the edge of the cot, forcing Jaskier to slide over or get squashed.

“You are an ass,” Jaskier said, giving an ineffectual shove to Geralt’s ribs.

Geralt arched a brow at Jaskier’s choice of insults, and Jaskier growled at him. He gave Geralt a harder shove, but Geralt easily caught his wrists and subdued him by pinning him to the sheets.

Jaskier’s eyes widened as Geralt loomed above him. He could smell the arousal rise in him again, something he usually ignored when they were close during travel. However, today it wasn’t as easy to just play dumb about Jaskier’s attraction to him. Especially, when he was looking up at Geralt with slightly parted lips and a racing pulse.

“Do...you use them all the same way?” Geralt asked, glancing over at the impressive collection of trinkets.

Jaskier followed his gaze, and he bit his lip as he studied his own belongings. “Depends,” he finally said, relaxing into Geralt’s hold on him.

“On what?” Geralt asked, his voice a soft rumble. He could feel his own body responding to Jaskier’s interest.

“Plenty of things. What I want to feel. How much time I have. Whether I’m somewhere safe enough to enjoy myself…”

“You’ve used them while we traveled?” Geralt asked, frowning deeply. Clearly, he only used them when Geralt was not around, and if they were traveling, Jaskier was never particularly safe especially when Geralt was off completing a contract. Jaskier did plenty of reckless things on a regular basis, but this was particularly reckless even for him.

“Calm down. I can see those cogs spinning. I...there is a small...if you’ll allow me my hand?” Jaskier wriggled his wrist in Geralt’s grasp.

Geralt released one of his hands, and Jaskier reached out and picked up a small object with a bulbous head that narrowed to a short connector then flared out again. Geralt wasn’t certain what material it was made from, but it was eye catching if confusing.

“See it has this part to prevent it from...dipping too far into the inkwell. It can be worn...beneath one’s smallclothes. Sometimes, if it is but a short journey to the next village, I will put it in while you prepare Roach…”

Geralt’s mouth fell open. “You have that _in you_...when we travel?” He truly didn’t know what to say to that. How could he even walk with such a thing inside him? What did he intend to do if they were attacked? Geralt’s mind got ahead of him, but thankfully Jaskier cut off his line of thought.

“Not always, in fact, hardly ever. I was curious, so I tried it. It was a terrible mistake because I hardly made it out of town without ruining my smallclothes from how aroused I was. It was a particularly uncomfortable journey, and listening to you grumble the entire way about me clearly needing to work off some pent up frustration...and then I did it the following journey after that as well, but not since...not _often_ since,” Jaskier said, studying the object he was holding up.

Geralt rolled his eyes at the fool he’d been traveling with for the better part of a decade. He plucked the item out of Jaskier’s hand and marveled at the heft of it as well as how smooth it was. He could feel his medallion vibrating as he held it and frowned.

“There is magic in this.”

“Well, yes, some of these require a certain touch to ensure their enduring quality. Wouldn’t want one of these breaking at the wrong moment. I collect from only the most skilled artisans and adventurous mages,” Jaskier said, plucking his plug from Geralt’s hands and placing it back on the table.

Geralt tried to wrap his head around that statement, but he decided it might be better not to look too deeply at it. 

“What do the others do?” Geralt asked, truly fascinated by the discovery of the trinkets’ purpose as well as Jaskier himself. He’d always just taken the man for a skirt chaser, but clearly he enjoyed his own pleasure as much as the shared pleasures he found with others. Or perhaps, he had grown some common sense and realized that if he continued to bed every willing body in their path, they’d soon be run out of every village they came to.

“Are you genuinely curious or are you just intending to poke fun at me for the remainder of your unnaturally long life?” Jaskier retorted, slapping Geralt’s hand away when it strayed too close to his precious collection.

“Both.”

Jaskier heaved a dramatic sigh, but he wiggled free of Geralt’s loose grasp and sat up so his legs were crossed. His knee brushed Geralt’s thigh as he got settled. Neither of them made any move to separate.

“If you must know my every secret,” Jaskier said dramatically.

“You store those secrets in Roach’s saddlebags.”

“And if Roach would like to know the particulars of my collection, she need only ask.”

“Hmm.”

“Oh very well,” Jaskier said, rubbing his hands together, clearly pleased to be able to brag about his impressive collection even if Geralt might tease him for it afterward. The fact that the puffed peacock of a man hadn’t already insisted on telling Geralt about his trinkets during their travels was actually more impressive than the collection itself. “Where to begin…” He stuck his tongue out for a moment as he studied the items.

“What about—”

“No, no. There is a proper way to go about this which you would not understand. I shall leave the monster knowledge to you, but you must leave the pleasure arts to me,” Jaskier insisted as he plucked a long, slim piece of glass from the table.

“Mm.”

“Your boorish grunts will not ruin the truly incredible pleasure that I just achieved, so make all the silly noises you please, but I’m the one who just achieved true ecstasy with a small piece of glass.”

“Wouldn’t your hand suffice?” Geralt asked, watching Jaskier stroke the small instrument almost lovingly.

“Geralt, do you even listen to yourself? I have heard what your hand can do plenty of times, and trust me it was not inspiring.”

Geralt did not comment that his scent said otherwise. He did watch his words despite Jaskier’s claims to the contrary. “Very well, what is this?”

“This is a phallus,” Jaskier said, holding up the smooth cylindrical item.

Geralt gave him a questioning look, and Jaskier huffed out a heavy breath. 

“You use it like you would a partner…”

“You could always just find a partner.”

Jaskier threw his hands up. “This is impossible. I am trying to explain art to a man with no imagination.”

“I understand how sex works, Jaskier. I’ve been doing it for decades longer than you’ve been alive,” Geralt told him, questioning why he wanted to know this anyway.

“Bah! This isn’t sex, Geralt. It is carnal pleasure. All of the wonderful feelings without the angry spouses or the exchange of coin,” Jaskier proclaimed, waving the phallus around as his arms came up to punctuate his point as they often did.

“But you exchange coin to procure—”

“I can’t!” Jaskier threw up his hands then dropped the phallus in Geralt’s lap before grabbing his own smallclothes and tugging them down his thighs. 

Geralt blinked as Jaskier stripped them off then fell back on the straw mattress, his legs falling open lewdly.

“What are you doing?” Geralt asked, rather concerned that Jaskier was so cross with him that he would act so bizarrely. 

“Giving you a proper demonstration since you cannot seem to fathom the depth of pleasure my trinkets can conjure. Now, hand over that vial there,” Jaskier said, pointing to the vial resting beside one of the items.

“You intend to show me?” Geralt asked, looking over Jaskier’s body. His long legs were braced on the mattress, giving Geralt a good view of his half-hard cock lying between them. Jaskier had clearly been more successful in recent months because Geralt could spy a softness in his stomach that was not there in previous years. It was surprisingly appealing to find him healthy. The prospect of seeing him pleasure himself was appealing as well.

“Geralt, the vial. You may look your fill once you follow my directions,” Jaskier told him, making a grabbing motion with his hand.

“Hmm.” Geralt grunted as he reached for the vial and handed it to Jaskier. He wasn’t sure questioning Jaskier was wise. It wasn’t like they hadn’t seen each other naked before. They’d even shared a whore or two in the past. This was just...different.

“Now, which of my pleasure toys would you like to see a proper demonstration with?” Jaskier asked, pulling the stopper free of the vial and pouring a bit of oil onto his fingers.

“I can only choose one?” Geralt asked, quirking his lip in some semblance of a smile.

“You naughty fiend. Pick which you would like to start with then,” Jaskier said, giving Geralt a soft kick for his teasing. It helped make things feel more balanced. This wasn’t any different than when Jaskier insisted on playing him two identical melodies then asking him to determine which was better. Well, maybe it was different, but Jaskier was approaching it with the same amount of exasperation for Geralt’s ignorance.

Geralt didn’t know where to begin, so he just held up the phallus that was still in his hand. 

“Oh, a splendid choice if I do say so myself,” Jaskier said, reaching between his legs and pressing one slick finger into himself. He thrust it in several times before removing it and holding out his hand.

Geralt had to tear his gaze away from Jaskier’s hole which was glistening with the oil he’d spread there. He received a shy smile when he finally did look up at Jaskier and hand over the toy.

“Perhaps you’d like to get more comfortable,” Jaskier suggested as he poured a bit of oil onto the toy before replacing the stopper and handing it back to Geralt. 

Geralt placed it on the table as he watched Jaskier slowly stroke the toy to spread the oil over it. While Jaskier did that, Geralt removed his boots and placed them beside Jaskier’s on the floor. Then he moved to kneel between Jaskier’s spread legs.

Jaskier immediately draped them over Geralt’s thighs as he knelt on the bed. He bit his lip as he looked down his body at Geralt, and Geralt’s own breath hitched at the sight before him. 

Geralt gently ran his palm over Jaskier’s calf as the man seemed to realize he was spread out completely naked and vulnerable before Geralt. The touch seemed to do the trick though because his fluttering pulse seemed to steady even if it was rather fast.

Pulling his legs back a little, so his feet were braced on Geralt’s thighs, he adjusted his hips just a hair. Once settled, Jaskier reached down with the toy in hand and pressed it gently to his hole. 

Geralt’s eyes jumped from the toy to Jaskier’s face. Jaskier’s tongue was poking out as he moved the toy around his rim, applying gentle pressure as he eased himself into this. Geralt licked his own lips, smelling the unmistakable scent of Jaskier’s building arousal.

Running his palms up and down Jaskier’s calves, he could feel his muscles relax under Geralt’s touch. Slowly, the end of the toy disappeared into Jaskier’s hole with a slow and steady press.

Jaskier released a small sigh as the toy sank past the ring of muscle that created resistance. 

“Once you’ve got it in, the artistry comes into play,” Jaskier’s said, sounding much as he did when he gave a guest lecture. There was authority behind his words, even if those words came out broken and breathy. “You want to find that particular pleasure spot within you.”

Jaskier pulled the toy out slowly before pressing it back in, angling it as he did so. 

Geralt bit his lip as Jaskier’s back arched off the cot for a moment as the toy sank in more deeply than the first time. He could feel Jaskier’s toes curling against his thighs as Jaskier continued to shift the angle of the instrument slightly.

“Right...oh fuck...there,” he gasped, legs falling open and back arching. 

Geralt moved his hands up to rub Jaskier’s trembling thighs as he pulled the toy back again and let himself breathe for a moment.

Jaskier pressed the toy in, easily finding the spot this time and once again arching into the pleasure he was clearly experiencing.

Geralt was hard in his pants just watching Jaskier fuck himself with the little glass phallus. His skin prickled like the air itself was charged with Jaskier’s sexual energy as Jaskier began to build a rhythm with the toy. 

Jaskier rolled his hips and ground down onto the little glass cock shamelessly as he gasped and moaned. His cock was fully hard and leaking against his abdomen. 

“Hand me that ring,” Jaskier said, pointing to a metal ring that was displayed with his other toys.

Geralt reached for it and held it out to Jaskier, but Jaskier just looked at him through pleasure glazed eyes. “Would you…” He bit his lip in indecision.

“What would you have me do with it?” Geralt asked, looked at the ring then down at Jaskier trying to figure out what he might do with the innocuous thing.

“It goes around the base of my cock. It is like a puzzle box. If you shift it right it will—”

Geralt twisted the device, and it broke into two pieces. 

Jaskier smiled at him. “A quick study. Now, fasten it around the base, behind me testicles.”

Gently lifting Jaskier’s balls, Geralt slid the bottom half of the device beneath them then carefully fit the top over his cock. He was mindful not to catch Jaskier’s skin as he closed the device again.

Jaskier whined and trembled once it was fastened, and he gripped the sheets as he panted through his arousal.

The toy slid free of him and Jaskier let it fall to the cot beneath his hips. “The curved instrument if you please,” Jaskier said, sounding so completely overwhelmed that Geralt was a bit concerned that he might expire from how aroused he was. Humans were delicate after all.

Geralt looked at the table once again, and his eyes immediately landed on the curved device that flared on one end then hooked on the other. Picking it up he held it over Jaskier’s hips.

“How do you use it?” he asked.

Jaskier looked up at him, eyes half lidded and hardly focused.

“Let me show you, then you may have a turn,” Jaskier said, taking Geralt’s hand rather than the toy and guiding him to place the flared end at his entrance. 

Geralt’s pulse raced as he guided the toy into Jaskier with Jaskier’s guidance. He quickly understood the point of the hooked end when it rested against the skin between Jaskier’s ass and testicles. The hook was large enough that Geralt could still wrap two fingers through it to control the pressure and depth of the toy, but he quickly found that he didn’t have to do much other than apply gentle pressure to have Jaskier crying out.

“More,” Jaskier gasped, pressing down harder against the toy. 

Geralt did as he was asked, mesmerized by the way that Jaskier released his hand to allow Geralt to control the toy. He pressed hard, shifting it slightly, and Jaskier groaned gripping the sheets tightly.

Pulling the toy out slowly, Geralt watched Jaskier tremble and throw his arm over his flushed face. His cock was thick and leaking, and Geralt could tell he was close. He pushed the toy back in, angling it as Jaskier had with the other one.

Jaskier cried out, arching off the bed and trembling, but he didn’t come. He was breathing hard, and the entire room was saturated in the scent of his arousal. 

Geralt did it again, and once again Jaskier positively quaked from the stimulation, but he didn’t come.

“So close,” Jaskier mumbled, stroking his cock as Geralt pulled the toy out again. 

This time, when he pushed it back in, he could feel Jaskier bear down on it, and when it brushed the spot within him, Jaskier tensed then collapsed against the cot, trembling as his cock twitched and spilled over his fist. 

A string of nonsensical words fell from Jaskier’s lips as he ran his fingers through his hair, tugging at it. Finally, after what seemed like minutes, Jaskier stilled. His legs hung limply over Geralt’s thighs. His arms lay over his face and stomach. 

“You’ve slain me, Witcher,” Jaskier muttered, groaning as Geralt very gently coaxed the toy from his body. 

“Dramatic as always, Jaskier,” Geralt said, stroking Jaskier’s thigh. 

“I am displaying the exact amount of drama suitable to properly explain the experience I just had. I feel as though my spirit left my body for a moment there when you angled the toy just so.” Jaskier lifted an uncoordinated hand to demonstrate the correct motion, but he ended up just scratching at the damp hair on his chest.

“Is that so?” Geralt was amused by Jaskier’s theatrics, but he was also uncomfortably turned on by the performance the man had just made.

“Yes, now do you understand the grave importance of my collection?” Jaskier asked, rolling onto his side and attempting to prop his head on his hand, but settling for stretching like a cat then curling around the space Geralt was taking up.

“Not sure,” Geralt muttered, glancing at the toys that hadn’t been used.

“Not sure? Not sure, he says! What more could you possibly need?” Jaskier demanded, sitting up and reaching down to take the ring from around his cock. He sighed in relief when he was finally free of it.

“You are a performer by trade. You might simply be exaggerating the whole thing…”

Jaskier’s mouth flapped, and he clutched at his chest. “You sir, are a horrid companion. To claim I faked one of the most pleasurable orgasms of my life. The gall!” 

Geralt smirked, giving Jaskier’s hip a gentle shove. Jaskier rolled over with flailing limbs and disgruntled squawking. 

“How can I be certain without experiencing it for myself?” Geralt asked. He was sometimes foggy on social norms, but he was quite certain that it was not polite to invite one’s self to take part in another’s sex trinkets. Still, Jaskier had forgiven him for his more heinous social missteps. 

“Geralt, are you—in your own peculiar way—asking for a more hands on demonstration?” Jaskier asked, ceasing his flailing and training his eyes directly on Geralt. “You are!” he proclaimed before Geralt could actually form words, which was probably for the best since Geralt had a history of fucking things up with words.

Jaskier scrambled to sit up again, completely comfortable with his continued nudity while Geralt was still completely clothed. He shoved lightly at Geralt’s arm before sweeping his arm over the table covered in his trinkets. 

“Which one interests you?” Jaskier asked, holding Geralt’s bicep with his other hand.

Geralt shrugged. He hadn’t actually thought this through. He’d just assumed that Jaskier would hit him with a shoe and call him a horse’s ass, then they’d go back to their usual cohabitation. However, Jaskier had a bright gleam in his eye that said he planned to see this through.

“Geralt, certainly one of these fine implements has caught your eye.” Jaskier picked up another phallic shaped object with a flared end, but no hooked end like the one Jaskier had used. He waggled his eyebrows at Geralt, but put it down again when Geralt just shrugged.

Jaskier picked up another trinket. This one was fairly thick and long, and it rippled in and out like waves caught in glass. 

“This one,” Jaskier said, not asking for Geralt’s opinion this time. “Take off...all of that.” Jaskier gestured to Geralt with his hand before sliding off the bed and walking over to the washbasin. He used a piece of linen to clean his belly, then reached between his legs and washed himself there as well. 

Geralt watched him move gingerly back to the cot. “Should I be worried?” Geralt asked, motioning to Jaskier’s cautious gait.

Jaskier looked up at him and frowned. “You are still dressed.”

Geralt rolled his eyes but began to unbutton his shirt. Jaskier slapped his hands away and made quick work of the tiny buttons. 

“Well, be of some use and work on those trousers,” Jaskier urged him.

Geralt sighed, but he followed the direction. It wasn’t like Jaskier hadn’t helped him strip before. On more occasions than Geralt was willing to count, he’d returned from a hunt too injured to undress, and Jaskier had helped him with only enough complaint to let Geralt know how worried he was. 

“Is this really…” Geralt looked up at Jaskier who was looking down at him with focus in his gaze. “You’re really going to stick that thing inside me?” 

Jaskier gave him a brilliant smile as he finished with the buttons and tugged Geralt’s shirt up, freeing it from where it was tucked into his pants. “My darling witcher, I intend to do far more than that. I intend to exorcise that contrary expression from your face through thorough and enduring pleasure facilitated by “sticking that inside of you” as you so eloquently put it.” The shirt came up over Geralt’s head and soon found a new home in the pile of his belongings beside the door.

“You seem so sure.”

“As I am sure you have never doubted your skills in the realm of witchery, I have never doubted myself in the realm of pleasure, Geralt,” Jaskier told him, turning away and walking over to his satchel and removing one of the vials he used to loosen Geralt’s stiff muscles. “Lie on your stomach when you’re finished.”

Gealt grumbled but followed Jaskier’s orders. He pushed his pants down his legs and draped them over the side of the bed before settling on his stomach. Watching Jaskier with sharp eyes, he found his companion setting out the wash basin, linen, as well as the collection of oils he carried.

“Do I smell offensively?” Geralt asked.

“No, but I want you relaxed, and I know no better way to achieve that than a bit of care,” Jaskier said, straddling Geralt’s hips without a thought to his own nudity.

Before Geralt could retort, Jaskier brushed the hair off the back of his neck and placed a cool cloth there. Then the scent of chamomile filled the room, and slick oil was spread over his shoulders. Jaskier’s strong fingers were quick to follow, digging into the tight muscles and slowly relieving the tension. 

Geralt quickly found his body relaxing and loosening at Jaskier’s practiced touch. The man had become particularly adept at working even the tightest knots out of Geralt’s back over the years. He could even ease most of the pain in Geralt’s bad knee most days. So, it wasn’t particularly difficult to let Jaskier have his way.

“Is it your age or your disposition that results in your back muscles becoming as firm as stone?” Jaskier asked, working his thumbs into a particularly troublesome knot in Geralt’s lower back.

“Is this how you speak to all of your bed partners, or am I a special case?” Geralt retorted.

“Oh, you want for romance? I thought you’d simply wanted a demonstration of my keen knowledge of the sexual arts. If it’s romance you like, I might comment on the pleasing slope of your back or the firmness of your bottom,” Jaskier said tartly. 

Geralt grunted as Jaskier lifted his hips to give Geralt’s ass a sharp slap. He wasn’t entirely sure why he put up with Jaskier, but he didn’t do more than buck his hips to dissuade Jaskier from further abuse.

“Yeah, yeah, I’d hate to damage such a fine specimen,” Jaskier said, going back to his massage, working his way down to Geralt’s ass.

By the time he reached Geralt’s ass, Geralt was loose and pliant beneath him. Reservations about what he’d asked Jaskier to do were a distant memory, while his whole body buzzed pleasantly. Only with Jaskier could Geralt allow himself to relax so thoroughly.

Jaskier massaged his cheeks with oil before gently circling his rim with the tip of a slick finger. Geralt groaned, tensing briefly before giving in to Jaskier’s touch once again.

“If you were this agreeable all of the time, perhaps we wouldn’t be tossed out of so many inns,” Jaskier mused as he once again pressed his finger to Geralt’s entrance, getting him used to the idea rather than forcing the subject.

“Mm. I believe it is more often your choice of bed partners that gets us thrown out,” Geralt grumbled, but there was no heat to his words.

“I don’t know what you are speaking of Geralt, but I will not be slandered as such, especially as I massage your lovely bottom so generously.”

Geralt just grunted in reply. Sometimes Jaskier just needed to hear himself speak. It was easier to let him rather than attempt to follow along.

“Don’t fight me,” Jaskier said, passing his finger over Geralt’s rim again before applying pressure in earnest. 

It took a moment, but Geralt felt the tip of Jaskier’s finger slip past the stubborn muscle before retreating almost immediately. Geralt grunted at the intrusion, but he forced himself to remain relaxed.

“Darling, might I ask you a personal question?” Jaskier asked, once again massaging Geralt’s ass.

“You’ll ask it whether I agree or not, so best to get it over with.”

“Right, yes. Geralt—and I ask this as your dear friend and the man about to put his fingers inside you—have you ever...let one go digging in your cavern before?”

Geralt snorted. “You mean other than whores?”

“Right...um, yes?”

“Mm. I am not unfamiliar with cave exploration,” Geralt used Jaskier’s own terrible analogy. It had become a bit of a joke over the years, seeing who could come up with the most outlandish euphemisms. 

“Right, good.” Jaskier sounded fluster by this, but he once again placed his finger to Geralt’s entrance and with less hesitation than before, pressed his finger inside.

Geralt hummed as he felt the digit sink deeper than Jaskier’s previous attempts, and this seemed to encourage him. The finger quickly slipped free before returning deeper still.

Jaskier built a slow rhythm which once again served to relax Geralt as he slowly loosened him for what was a rather substantial object. 

Geralt felt pleasure settle low in his gut, pleasant but not insistent. He was content to let Jaskier touch him and babble to him. Even without the promise of mind blowing completion, this was one of the more pleasant sexual encounters he’d had in years. Like monster contracts, sex was often an exchange of coin for service. It was certainly pleasurable, but it lacked the quiet intimacy of unguarded conversation. Geralt could never completely relax with his partners the way he could with Jaskier straddling his thighs and rambling away about gods only knew what.

When Jaskier had worked two fingers deep inside of him, Geralt let out a soft sigh as Jaskier found the spot he’d mentioned during his own demonstration. His balls tightened as his entire body tingled in a slow pleasure. When Jaskier kept sustained pressure on the spot, Geralt growled as he trembled with little control over the action.

“There it is. Lovely,” Jaskier praised, slowly removing his fingers and giving Geralt’s ass a gentle pat. 

Geralt was floating in a bit of a haze when he felt the blunt end of something that was definitely not Jaskier’s finger press against his hole.

“Don’t get shy on me now, Geralt,” Jaskier said when Geralt instinctively tensed.

Geralt forced himself to relax again, and he gritted his teeth when the pressure built again. The trinket felt massive pressing against his rim. 

Jaskier dug one of his thumbs into the sweet spot in Geralt's lower back that always made him go absolutely boneless during a massage. This time wasn’t an exception, and Geralt’s whole body just seemed to melt into the cot. 

Geralt grunted as the toy slid into him, leaving him feeling impossibly full despite it only being the tip of the toy inside him.

“That’s it, just relax,” Jaskier praised him as he continued to rub that same spot on his back.

Geralt had trouble parsing what he was feeling because he was torn between the arousal burning in his gut and the overall buzz of contentment that settled in the rest of him.

“Can you take a little more for me, Darling?” Jaskier’s voice was a distant wave washing over him.

Geralt hummed in agreement, relaxing into the intrusion. His breath caught as the toy sank deeper, spreading him wide before narrowing. The taper of the toy left Geralt reeling as it filled him more and more. When he tensed around it, he became profoundly aware of the unique shape, and it left him breathing heavily. His entire body tingled as the fire in his gut seemed to truly ignite.

“That’s it. Going to show you what you’ve been missing,” Jaskier said as he stroked Geralt’s back. He didn’t seem to mind at all that Geralt was covered in sweat and trembling. “Let’s get you onto your back now that you’re nice and relaxed.”

The toy was still inside Geralt as Jaskier’s hands gently guided him to roll onto his back. Geralt groaned as the movement shifted the toy until it brushed the spot inside him, and he saw stars as he fell onto his back.

“That’s good. Lift,” Jaskier commanded again, sliding something beneath Geralt’s hips when he lifted them. His entire body shook as the toy pressed forward into the little spot.

Jaskier pulled the toy out again, and Geralt had no control over his body as he pressed it back in from this new angle. Geralt shook as the groves of the toy stretched and relaxed his rim as it sank into him. 

Geralt’s fingers bit into his thighs as Jaskier began to build a steady rhythm, angling the toy just right each time and staggering the speed, so Geralt couldn’t anticipate it. Geralt was soaring.

“Wish you could see yourself like this. Stunning.” Jaskier’s voice hardly registered over the lightning storm Geralt found himself at the center of. Even Jaskier’s touch on his hip felt electric.

It could have been minutes or hours later when Geralt felt his gut swoop and his balls tighten. He made a strangled sound in warning, but he wasn’t even sure it made it past his lips.

Geralt’s entire body tensed and shook as he felt the pleasure crest over him, leaving him boneless and trembling as his balls emptied and his cock spilled over his belly.

“...quite spectacular, in fact.”

Geralt wasn’t sure how long he’d been gone when he became aware of Jaskier’s soft voice. He felt a damp cloth cleaning the sweat and come from his stomach. Geralt huffed out a breath when it ventured lower, cleaning his cock then between his cheeks. 

“Don’t get shy. It’s much more embarrassing to ruin your trousers if it leaks out at inopportune times,” Jaskier chided, continuing to clean him like it was nothing.

Geralt just sighed and let Jaskier do as he pleased. Frankly, he was still experiencing that pleasant floating feeling, and he wasn’t willing to trade it for any bit of dignity he might regain by seeing to his own needs.

“Imagine the indignity of battling a griffin when suddenly you’re soaking through your smallclothes and have oil dripping down your leg. Certainly a focus breaker...though I have the utmost confidence that you would battle through to victory no matter the state of your smallclothes.”

“Jaskier,” Geralt grumbled.

“Oh, you’re actually awake and not doing that dazed meditation thing. Welcome back, Geralt. I think that demonstration went quite well, and I deserve two helpings of stew tonight for my troubles,” Jaskier informed him, patting Geralt’s thigh.

Geralt grunted. 

“Articulate as ever. Nevertheless, very good, then it’s agreed upon.”

“Hmm. Come here,” Geralt said, lifting his arm and gesturing Jaskier forward.

“Yes?” Jaskier leaned over Geralt, blinking down into his eyes with a curious look on his face.

Geralt wrapped his arm around Jaskier’s waist and pulled him flush against his chest.

“Oh!” Jaskier quickly settled in, sliding to the side to tuck himself into Geralt’s side. “Had I known all it took to make you cuddly was a satisfying orgasm, I would’ve suggested this a long time again.” He patted Geralt’s chest affectionately before resting his head atop it.

Geralt grunted, settling his arm around Jaskier’s back and letting the exhaustion of a satisfying orgasm settle over him.

“Shouldn’t you perhaps be looking for another contract?” Jaskier mused, running his fingers through Geralt’s chest hair.

“The mother of the boy seemed quite bent on accusing me of all sorts of evils. Probably best I remain out of sight until we are prepared to leave,” Geralt said, eyes closed and seeking the sleep he hadn’t had in weeks.

“She what? I should go to the tavern and sing of your bravery and good deeds. We can’t let her poison them against you,” Jaskier insisted, giving Geralt’s chest a little shove as though to get up.

Geralt held him tighter, not letting him get away. “Best to let it be. Can’t change the minds of those who don’t want them changed.”

“Geralt, you wound me. I have made it my life’s work to change the minds of the masses. I am fairly good at it if I do say so myself. I’ll just slip down to the tavern, play a few songs, and you’ll have people throwing contracts perhaps even their daughters at you.”

“Or you could stay here and enjoy your baubles.”

“You call them my baubles?” Jaskier asked, once again resting his palm on Geralt’s chest. It felt nice.

“What else would I call them?” Geralt asked, opening one eye to look at Jaskier who was looking down at him with a particularly dazzling smile. Geralt immediately knew he was being laughed at.

“It is not so much the name but the sentiment. You simply thought that I collected glass rods to weigh down our packs? You thought a man who spends the bulk of his life traveling on foot with only what he can carry in his pack would go out of his way to collect baubles to simply _look_ at?” Jaskier asked, sounding half offended and half amused by the prospect.

“Why would I assume that you spend your coin on items to mine your caverns with then weigh down your bags?” Geralt asked, letting his eyes fall shut again.

“Geralt, you have known me for more than a decade. That is exactly the sort of thing I would do, and with just cause. You yourself have felt the importance of my _baubles_. Tell me they are not worth every mild inconvenience. You cannot!”

Geralt snorted, squeezing Jaskier to his side until he wheezed. “Your libido will be the death of us.”

“It will certainly be a more pleasant demise than the one you’re seeking.”

“Hmm.”

“Geralt?” Jaskier asked, when Geralt began to drift off.

“What?”

“Why did you let me keep them if you thought they were useless?”

“They seemed to make you happy.”

“Sugar makes Roach happy, but you still don’t let her eat enough of it to give her a stomach ache.”

“You spend so much time, energy, and coin making others happy. If little bits of strangely shaped glass made you happy, then who was I to condemn it.”

“Even if it weighed Roach down.”

“Jaskier, Roach is a horse. Your bag of glass phalluses likely don’t even register to her. They barely even register to me.”

“Right. You were teasing, of course.”

“You were concerned?” Geralt asked, raising a brow without actually opening his eyes.

“Perhaps a little. I didn’t...I don’t want to be a burden,” Jaskier admitted, stroking his fingertips lightly over Geralt’s pecs. 

“You are a pest, Jaskier...but never a burden.” Geralt squeezed him close. He pressed a kiss to his hair, and noted that he smelled heavily of contentment.

Jaskier snorted, but he rested his head against Geralt’s chest again. “You say the sweetest things, Darling.”

“Mm.”

If they slept the afternoon away before performing another demonstration of the versatility of Jaskier’s collection, no one was the wiser. And if they both walked a little more gingerly than usual as they set out the next day, they were in good company.


End file.
